Bosom Buddies

A new blog!

2007-03-07T04:38:00.000+02:00

Visit us at our new blog (click the link to be taken there):

http://bosombuddies.typepad.com/bosom_buddies

Thank you!

Maternity staff party

2006-12-16T17:48:00.000+02:00

Every year the doulas (trained birth support women) used to give the mothers a bag filled with goodies at Christmas time as a once off prezzie.

Because Bosom Buddies is now giving even more gorgeous bags three times a week, we suggested that BB get together with the doulas (of which I am actually one too!) and give the nursing staff a gift instead.

We had 23 bags sewn up by the very nifty Monica who lives in Khayalitsha and filled them with all sorts of goodies from various people that Lisa Southin organized.

(Inge Bosman paid for the labor of the bags so thanks loads.)

I then approached different stores to get food & drinks sponsored for the Christmas party and many agreed to help us out.

On the morning of the party I had the inevitable happen with people letting us down and not delivering on their promises except for.

Pick n Pay Waterstone Village. Kevin the manager handed me over to his manageress Sanet who took my wish list out of my hand and proceeded to fill a trolley with TONS of food and festive tinsel, Christmas crackers, red & green napkins, juices and cakes & tarts. I was blown away by their generosity. I had prayed that morning for all we needed and who does God put in my path..? Sanet, an ex nurse! Coincidence? Not a chance!

I then had to dash off to Woolies at the Mall to pick up the rest of the food although Kevin & Geraldine had said it wasn't much, just some veggies & strawberries.

Drove around to dispatch and almost passed out when I saw the mountains of food. I was stressing big time as I had to get to the hospital in 45 minutes and I had to now find another charity to give the excess food to. Weather cooking hot, food potentially going to spoil. Aaaaaaaaaaargh!

I hate wasting food, especially when I know people are starving here.
Anyway, luckily Andy & Lynn from CHE met me in the parking lot and we loaded off most of the food into their car which they took into the townships. The people were stoked!
I then dashed off via home (pick up other food) to meet Lisa at the hospital and a couple of us set up all the food and decorations. The nurses and other ward staff were thrilled and touched with their gift and the party. We set aside enough for the night staff and all those who were on leave.

I want them to know we do appreciate their hard work and know the conditions under which they have to perform. Sometimes I get irritated with the sense of entitlement and total lack of gratitude some of the mothers show. Some of them are just surly and rude. Imagine what it is like for the nurses! I do know my attitude is wrong and not very Mother Theresa-ish. I really do love most of the precious moms.

Actually I must apologize for my attitude, its just a few of the preemie moms who take a second bag and pretend they haven't received one before who piss me off a little.
I should just know they have so little so that's why they sneak a second one but it's dishonest and means someone else doesn't get. Grrrrrrrrrr!

Anyway, a quick update of what's been going on lately.

December is a busy month with many babies and plenty preemies who are transferred from other hospitals.

The neonatal ICU was very busy yesterday but they all looked great and the room has such a golden light feeling to it for a change. Sometimes it feels so dark and sad in there but not yesterday.

While we were visiting we had 2 babes born within 10 minutes of each other. The poor women were yelling and groaning, but then finally, one little girl and one big boy born with a huge head. (OUCH!)

We gave out 16 bags in total so that's pretty busy. It was the first time we have gone on a Friday as we always do Thursdays. The previous day I couldn't find one single person to go with me and felt very strongly it was a mistake to go in alone. I know this probably sounds a little freaky / Lordy to some of you, but God clearly states (in the bible) that when 2 people are together in His name, He is there. 2 are better than one and we can stand in agreement on certain things. One going in alone is too vulnerable, like a sheep wandering off to the edge of the field. Snap, snap says the wolf and chomps up the sheep.

Am I making sense? I am the sheep, the devil is the wolf and I don't want to get chomped.

Today is Saturday and we were wandering if it was worth going because of yesterday. Liz decided to go anyway with a new recruit, Renee. She had phoned ahead and we were told 4 moms but I packed 9 bags just in case.

She landed up having to come home and pack more bags it was so busy. (15 bags) They also had a stillbirth mother so fortunately could spend some time with her and give her the bag we had prepared for her. So that's 31 bags in 2 days, crazy hey! Renee had an awesome visit and wants to come again which is good for us.

The previous week we had NO bags sewn and had a really bad volunteer week. I decided I didn't want to get too hung up on the details so Liz organized strong paper gift bags and we packed those for the Saturday and Monday visit. It worked out fine and is great for a back up.
We are now packing a POOR bags which we indicate by drawing a little heart on the back of the card. In addition to the regular goods, these have cloth nappies/diapers in with nappy liners, waterproof pants & a snappi in. We also put extra clothing in those bags.

It is a little tough deciding who gets those bags but nice to give.

Our clothing supply is good at the moment and blankies too. The sewing of the bags is not great but hopefully we will continue to get funding to pay Monica to make up the shortfall. We have been very blessed lately with about R3500 coming in the last month.

Which brings me to my long overdue thank you list:

Leana & Erica plus all the moms from the breastfeeding clinic

Jenna & her husband Charlie, parents to trips William, Elizabeth & Carolyn. They sent the most awesome parcel with exquisitely made baby blankets, clothes, products & goodies for mom. All the way from California.

Judy, Molly and Tamara, the Sugarplum faeries from Plumstead who sent us a whack of babygros, cloth nappies, liners, snappis, salt, vests and everything we needed. They even put English & Xhosa instructions on the salt which just reduces me to grateful tears!

Ladies from my church who always give

Delint & her mom who gave us a Hi-Fi for our kangaroom. Vibes at last!

Colleen Gast who told me I can use the R130 I owe her for my snazzy cake plate and buy products for BB. (I won't forget!)

Irene Bourquin who collected products from her ante-natal moms

Dezi & Verna who bought 2 newborn baby clothes packs

Doreen Freeman, Leighâ€™s granny who knitted for us

Lynn Hawkinss English ladies who sent us loads of wool and knitted cardigans from the UK

Lara Kirsten from Woolies who organized us Woolies waste

Kevin & Sanet from Pick n Pay Waterstone Village for all our party food

David & Geraldine from Woolies Mall for the remaining food

Megan & Twiggy for a second lot of clothing

Tina Hovaker from Pasadena, USA who sent us a gorg parcel of cute baby girl new clothing. We all oohed & aahed over the cute US clothes!

Cozy jerseys for next year from the elderly ladies at St Francis in Simonstown.

Generous cash donation from Retha & Lourens on behalf of their boys David & Stefan. This pays Monica for 3 months, yahoooo!

Lee's step dad who donated R2000 for us, we have put R1000 in our bank account and I sent Lee & Eleni shopping with the remaining R1000 for baby things. What fun.

Liz Holmes from JHB who gave us a great big box of dummies & bottles. It has been great having so many because we out 2 dummies in each bag.

And you, whose name is not on this list. Please forgive me, I suck at the admin and have lost track of some donors. I am ever so grateful though and we cannot survive without people like yourself. Ta!

To my volunteers, thanks forever. Please don't bail on me now. I really don't want to stop for Christmas and believe these moms, if anything, need extra TLC.

We are going on Christmas day after church so let me know who wants to join.

Bring on the mince pies!

Thank you

2006-12-08T19:22:00.000+02:00

Hi there!

Thought I'd better send you the list of who has given to BB so that you have a record. I noticed that
you thank people on the blog.

Veronique (clothes and about R200)
Catherina
Noorliza
Cara
Alvina
Jane
Gaelin
Megan
Petrina
Liz
Leonie
Michelle
Kyle
Mireya
Anna
Liz
Bhakti
Charlotte
Zoe
Gloria
Sarah
Carol
Reena
Sylvia
Sandra
Lin
Lorraine

Plus ..... Peter (a friend from www.asiamedicalservices.com) who drove me and my car around HK picking up all the packages
on Friday. I would never have managed it without him. Plus Max (hubby) who fully supports the project (financially as well to pay the unaccompanied luggage fee).

Some people ran out of time to either send or deliver to me as too far to pick up with such little time left - next time! But there were many who had the thought and intention too. I told one lady not to worry, that she can donate to another charity (her daughter had hurt her arm and so I did not want people to stress about getting the clothes ready etc) in HK of her choice. She replied saying she was fussy where she gave stuff too and after reading the info I sent her (which was on your blog about what you do) she decided this was the one that was going to get her stuff. So she packed all the items together - all the bibs, all the onesises etc in neat little parcels and sent a taxi to pick it up and deliver to me - she lives pretty far.

I am really touched and impressed by the generosity.

Have a super weekend!

Cheers, Jasmin

Little Warriors

2006-12-01T16:32:00.000+02:00

I am not sure why but we have had loads of preemies lately. The incubators are all full and mostly doubled up. These littlies are our warriors, fighting for their very lives.

We couldn't go in today because the awesome Dr White (my paed too) was attending to them. He comes around for a few hours and teaches the young trainee doctors how to care for these small people.

One little boy was just too small to be ventilated and he was explaining that the complications of blindness and possible cerebral palsy was just too great a chance. They were monitoring him and making him as comfortable as possible. Another 3 babes were also micro preemies, poor little sausages!

The bigger babes are all tucked between their moms boobs waiting till they hit the magical 1.8kg mark so they can go home.

The kangamoms were in fairly good spirits, one of the mothers sucked the dummy in her own mouth to clean it off. I know we all do that at some stage but not quite for our preemie or newborn. It is just such a different way of life and shows you how tough babies really are.
One of the biggest frustrations of birth at state hospitals is poor obstetric care due to lack of staff, funding and just plain ignorance. Some staff do know what to do but are not supervised or trained properly. The result is many babies born with problems due to a poorly managed labour and birth. This is such a shocking waste. A child that was 100% fine is now mentally and sometimes physically challenged. A mother now has to care for this child in her straightened circumstances of poverty and poor support. In fact, some we still lose healthy infants at birth. Makes me CRAZY but nothing I can do unfortunately.

We decided yesterday to put a few cloth nappies, snappi and waterproof in some of the bags. I draw a little heart at the back of the card to indicate it's for an extra poor mother. I haven't done it before because of the snappi problem and then I get a mail from Jasmine in Hong Kong who just bought us a box with 900 snappis from China. She is coming down in December and bringing those as well as baby clothes for BB. We are VERY excited! God is good!!

I don't have my thank list with me so will do at a later point.

Last week our church had their end of year ladies do and we asked people to bring things for BB instead of our usual gift swap. Was great and we got many much needed stuff, especially products! Thanks kind ladies !!!

It was exactly a year prior that I got to share my vision of what I hoped BB would be so I did another report back of what has happened in this past year and where we are. God has been so amazing in providing exactly what we need when we need it.

He has taught me so much about giving, loving, having faith and obedience.

I led the previous Saturday's youth visit and I prayed specifically that He would let me see these ladies how he sees them. It was such a cool visit and they were all so beautiful to me. I just touched their faces and really got to bless them and love them. Today my toddler has croup and I had to get to my Doc after the visit so I was distracted a little. Each visit is a little different but each one special.

On the 12th of December we have the Christmas party for the maternity staff. They are looking very forward to it and we have got Woolies & Pick n Pay to sponsor for the snacks. We have been collecting little prezzies to pop in the bag for a while now so hope we have a good stash. They used to be a bit offish in the beginning but now that they see we are here to stay, they seem to accept and welcome us.

The charity organization that assists the hospital have never really forgiven me for stepping on the toes/hearts so they still flatly ignore me. It is a great pity as we could help each other and should be on the same side. Anyway, it seems the charity business is as political as any other.
I will update my thanks list soon, just waiting to get all the concerts and other kid stuff out the way so we can chill and enjoy the holidays.

Can't wait !

Oops, I forgot Mel's update

2006-11-21T15:25:00.000+02:00

Sorry about that Mel.

Sorry, I know I am a VERY bad blog updater but crazy busy.
The great thing is Bosom Buddies has grown so fast and so amazingly since our first visit in March. The bad thing is the volume of work and the lack of resources to accomplish this. We are up to 170 bags a month....... whooohoooo!!

I seriously need to make a plan. Ideally I need to pay someone a few hours a week to do all the admin. This entails record keeping, financial, keeping up to date with the thank-you's & basic marketing. Pippa I miss you hidden under all those children of yours!!(4 week old Thomas, 15 month old Emily, 5 year old Jordy)

Pippa and I are hoping that in a years time we will have sufficient funding to pay ourselves a basic salary, her 1st and then me. We will only do this when every mother receives a bag.
Pippa plans to return in about 5 months time which is good because my other va va voom volunteer Heather, is preg with twins.

Not sure what it is about Bosom Buddies but almost everyone who gets involved gets pregnant.
More than half the girls so far:

Mish with baby # 4

Alice with baby # 2

Marla with baby # 1

Heather with baby # 3 & 4

Nadine with baby # 2

(Tabisa, Pippa & Hannelie already had their babies)
Anyway, let me get to what's happening.......

LOADS of baby girls being born lately
Unfortunately also many preemies but few twins
No stillbirths for months and then 2 last week. I so hate it that they share a ward with the mothers and babies. They lie in the corner bed and face the wall. It's so painful to see them just crying and waiting to be fetched. I want to try and get some training organized for the nurses on dealing with neonatal death and how to cope best with the mother. I will need to be very subtle as they are often sensitive & defensive. They are just so overworked and underpaid and basically just fed up. We did a fair amount during our Doula training plus having lost my precious nephew Ben after 10 days, I know a little. I wouldn't do the training myself but will get a specialized counselor in to assist.
Saturday youth day is going SO well. It's is exactly what I wanted it to be and Liz, my organizer has been brilliant. Thanks so much! It's so cool when someone owns what they do and I know I can rely on them 100%. The teens are all very enthusiastic and definitely touched by their visits.

Sewing situation ever stressful but we are working on getting some funding for job creation and paying someone. It's a win-win! My friend Jen's nanny has Lupus and can no longer work. We want to get her trained up and equip her to work at home so she can have an income. She is very intelligent so I know would do great. Plus more honest than Mrs Faith Kmaliwe from Nomzamu who did a runner with 40 bags, months worth of material & cotton and my scissors I purchased for her! Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

Thank you to the following....

(I know, I know.... you must think me very ungrateful and rude to be so slow in thanking people but I just cannot keep up with all the admin. This is actually a good thing as means we are getting in tons of stuff. Please know we are so grateful and you ARE making a difference!)
My gorg brother PAUL in London who raised 120 quid for me and is busy organizing another fundraiser in his pub so will probably raise another. With the rand being so week it means R1680!

Lynne McKenzie and the ladies at Boland Ladies Network who donated R1300 cash for us. We got to buy bags of cute blankie fabric which was on sale.

Twiggy & Megan.... 2 very special moms who have twins of 12 weeks called Hannah & Nicolas. They have being on the most incredible journey to conceive these little people and you cannot believe the gorgeous clothing they donated. 3 massive bags of almost new things, probably worn for 5 minutes by the looks of things!

Vera from SBH Cotton Mills who gave us about 400kg of fabric to make the bags.

Thanks to husband Gary who collected for me and Wayne Allen who is storing some for me.

Thanks also to Anna from Treehouse who donates her offcuts to add that cute factor to the bags
Liz to all the extras she brings.

Kate aka Dr Whites.

Dezi & Verna for the babygros

Laura (congrats on baby Oliver born last week) who donated pads and mom stuff

Americans who have sent me parcels with sweetest ever baby clothes

Gawie & Nadine who bought me 2 packs of little preemie nappies and a bunch of blankies.

Everyone at Every Nation Church in Somerset West who support us and pray for us

Leana & Erica and all the mothers at the breastfeeding clinic who leave us goodies in the pink box.

Chis, Jen's friend from swimming for the clothes & blankets.

Sam & Wilna and all at Garden Court Hotel for all the linen, pillows and towels. You knocked my socks off with the huge quantity you donated to myself and Thembacare.

Carice & Andre for a second huge lot of gorgeous clothing

Warren at Dischem again for various goods for both mom and baby

Jeanine's mom for the blankets

Angus Mattee at Woolworths for the big box of baby & children clothing for BB and Thembacare Athlone

My card makers, bakers, sewing ladies, hospital volunteers and especially Colette, Mish, Heather, Pippa & Jeanine. What would I do without you gals??!

And now I'm off to run around fetching things, packing bags, thanking people and then tomorrow my delicious morning of holding fresh new babies and kissing little heads full of springy curly hair. Yum!

Bosom Buddies latest

2006-11-06T16:09:00.000+02:00

letter mailed out to my church members who help me enormously and keep us going!

Bosom Buddies Latest....

Hi everyone. Thanks so much to all of you who help, each contribution both big and small, keeps us going.

We are now going 3 days a week and delivering an average of 180 bags. If you feel left out and also want to be part of the BB action, we have a few vacancies left....

Saturdays

The Saturday youth day has been awesome so far. We have 1 adult team leader with 3 or 4 teen girls who visit each Saturday. The girls have been both overwhelmed and touched by the previous 2 visits with Liz. This is a stunning mom-daughter opportunity so maybe one Saturday a month you join the girls?

Vacancies:

Team leader
Youth volunteers
Monday & Thursday Visits
We still need more people on for each day. You do not have to attend each week but can do alternate weeks or even once a month. Nadine is going on Mat leave and Thursdays are busy so join us pls!

Vacancies:

Mondays: one extra person
Thursdays: 2 extra people

Sewers

Join the ranks of Jean, Jeanine (Shofar Church) Rosaline, Lorraine, Heather, Marla, Colleen, Virginia, Gina and Yolandie. We are looking for a certain quantity per month from each person. The number doesn't matter, you sew as much as you have time for. (We are looking for commitment though as planning has become essential and I need to work on a set monthly number.) Find a partner and do it together so one can cut and iron, and the other sews. Yak, yak, yak…..much more fun and efficient too! You do not have to fund anything as I supply all the fabric, if you have fleece or blankie fabric, then that helps but not a major.
Blankets: Another 2 people are required. (Must have over-locker)

Bags: Always need more people!

Bakers

Each bag has a little yum treat inside. Thanks to Kim, Michelle Beckett, Phillipa & Carmen who bake every 2nd week for BB.

Vacancies

Alternate Saturdays (bake 20 lots of suitable items such as 4 biscuits or crunchies, or a muffin in each pkt.)

Food supplies

We look after the kanga moms who have to stay at the hospital till their babes have reached 1.8kgs. This sometimes takes 2 months. It’s long and boring and they are easily discouraged.
We leave them tea, coffee, sugar, milk and bread. They have asked for peanut butter & jam which I did buy this week. They also asked for washing powder and pegs which we supply from time to time. We cannot afford to keep the food shopping up so we are hoping for people who will purchase what they need once a month. If I get 2 people a month, supplies will be sufficient. (the team leaders supply the bread each visit)

The shopping will be +- R130 a month so if that is too steep then every second month would be amazing for BB. That’s only 4 people a month!

Shopping list

Tin Coffee +- R25
100 pack teabags +- R10
6 pack carton milk +- R 35
Tin jam +- R10
Peanut butter +- R18
5 kg Packet sugar +- R28

Pads

Our weekly cost is R160 as I have a contact and purchase them for R7 a packet.
They come in bulk packets of 12, 12 in each individual pack for R84.
If you would like to sponsor a bulk pack, you would be helping us out enormously! First choice is of course product sponsorship of reject or package damaged stock . So far no luck in approaching companies so if you have a contact, then share away!

Bulk pack sponsorship @ R84 a month

Prayer

Most important of all! Please pray for Bosom Buddies on a regular basis, especially 9.00 to 10.00am on the visit days.
Please also pray for protection for myself and the team. My two year old Sofia (my youngest and adored baby) has been in hospital 5 times this year with various ailments & had 2 operations. (thanks to all of you who prayed for her yesterday) She is actually not a sickly child and this is just not acceptable! Am beginning to feel like a dodgy mom!

Contact Details

Saturdays Liz 6378337
Mondays Alice
Thursdays Mel 8522004 or 0829239038
Baking & Sewing Mel

Financial Sponsorship Bosom Buddies

Somerset Mall 114145
Acc #: 1141018144
(use your name as reference so we can thank you!)

Pads Can be purchased from supplier directly who delivers to my home or you can pay into our bank account by debit order

Bronwyn Holmes from Mother’s Choice 8554936 or 0824974584

Thanks to all of our loyal donors who always bring goods for BB to church every Sunday. If I am not there then you can give to Colette Breedt or Michelle Farrer.

Mail me: doulamel@gmail.com

Blog: http://bosombuddiesthankyou.blogspot.com/

Mobile: 0829239038

Landline: 8522004

Love in Him, Mel
XXX

Liz's Saturday Report Back

2006-10-25T20:26:00.000+02:00

Saturday 21st October was our first Saturday venture to the hospital. Yay - God is good! The 2 young girls from our church greeted me with great enthusiasm (it was their first visit). Once through the hiccup with the security guard at the entrance (he didn't want to let us in initially), we walked excitedly, perhaps somewhat apprehensively, down the passage towards the maternity section, laden with beautifully, lovingly sewn bags.
We took 15 bags with us and left with only one! Praise the Lord! All the mums were new (except for the ones in the kanga room) and there were a lot in labour. They all received us well and were visibly touched with the gift and the prayer. It's amazing to see the newborns, so beautiful and so precious, so loved. Some with lots of hair, some without, some with straight hair, some with curly hair – it's gorgeous! We had a lady with us who is pregnant for the first time and she mentioned afterwards how emotional it was for her. To see the mum with new babe, only hours old, and, seeing the mothers in labour and the pain and discomfort in their eyes etc. To think that she'll be in that same situation in a few months made her think and get a different perspective!
We stood at the doorway of the ICU ward to pray and didn't go to each individual incubator as we didn't want to get in the way of the nurses. The sight of the tiny precious babies seemed a little too overwhelming for one of the girls who burst into tears and was consoled by their youth leader.
So, all in all, it was a wonderful visit! I left the hospital feeling great! It's hard to put into words just how I felt but it was a 'God' feeling! Just so elated at God's amazingness (is there such a word?!!!), so aware of His presence and goodness and provision. I prayed a lot before this visit, mostly in the spirit, because I wasn't really sure what to ask God for and you know; God is so faithful. Even though I had no idea what, specifically, to pray for (other than the norm for the mums and babies etc), He met me in the midst of that. It reminded me of: 'If we show ourselves faithful, God shows Himself faithful.' I bumped into a friend of mine about half an hour after I left the hospital and she said to me 'you look lovely this morning, you're glowing!' My answer was, 'it must be God - I've just had an amazing time at the hospital!'
It's such a privilege to be part of this awesome ministry! Mel, you are a courageous, brave, obedient woman of God. As we stand with you, faithfully, that ALL the Bosom Buddies needs will be met, God will meet us there.

It only takes one

2006-10-19T18:12:00.000+02:00

I have trained myself to give without expecting anything back, to give without expecting a thank you. I think I have got this lesson covered and I don't get disappointed or offended when the mothers do not thank me or acknowledge the gift. I understand they are sometimes shy, sometimes overwhelmed, occasionally ungrateful and often they feel entitled to the gift.

But..... today I had a big African lady who had just given birth to her 3rd daughter. She was SO chuffed and thrilled with the gift. She opened the bag taking everything out and laid it all on the bed. She put the little knitted pink & white hat on her girly's head and gave her big noisy kisses. She then gave the empty bag back thinking she couldn't keep it till I returned it in her hands telling her it was for her.
She laughed with delight and thanked us profusely and I felt so good. I am back on my horse! Motivated and filled up ready to bless many more moms again. It wasn't the thanks so much, (although that was nice) it was more the joy she received from getting the bag. Yay!

We have been pretty busy in the last few weeks and Saturday 21st is our 1st Youth day at the hospital. I am excited and terrified at the same time. Getting that much more clothing etc plus the extra bags is going to be hectic!!!
But, I really believe God is going to do something awesome in the life of these teens and they are going to learn some lessons, hard lessons but valuable ones.
The bags are looking amazing but they are taking too long to sew. I am forced to simplify them which is a shame because they look so great. I wish I had the funds to pay someone full time but that will hopefully come at a later point.
Yesterday we had a 14 year old girl that gave birth to a little boy which was the product of incest rape. It was a very close family member (brother or father I think) so the baby has gone off to another local hospital for genetic testing. Her mother has rejected her completely but her aunt has offered to take them in. It's such a mess so for now the girl has gone home and the baby is staying at the hospital and then fostered until such time it can all be sorted out. A social worker has been assigned to her case. She brought nothing for the baby so it was great to be able to leave her a full bag plus a whole load of extra goods. Today we had a mom who had her 7th child, a little angel called Bianca. The ward was busy with about 10 ten preemies. We have a very cute 19 year old mom in kangacare whose tiny daughter is still in neonatal ICU but doing well. She was so bored and feeling down so the nurses said she could go into town to walk around a bit. She is skinny and so very young I wish she didn't have such a rough start.

No stillbirths for ages which is such a blessing!

Two woman in labour, one at 5cm, the other at 2cm. The latter moaning and wailing in pain and so far to go still. Poor thing! How I wish I could stay and Doula for them, maybe next year when Sofia is at playgroup. (If I ever pluck up the courage to part with my sweetie girl!)

As always, my people I need to say THANK YOU to:

Winnie from the Strand who knitted beautiful preemie booties and 2 gorg jerseys
Heather from Stellenbosch who organized a baby shower for her sister-in-law and got people to buy for BB
Adrienne Liebenberg from my church who spoilt us with new baby clothes and blankets as well as baby products
Lorraine from my church who sews for us and gave us pads as well as buttons & ribbons for jerseys
Tina Hovaker from the US who sent me 2 parcels of exquisite baby girl clothing and baby products.
Mrs Joan Schnider from Somerset West who knitted 8 preemie outfits for us
Tessa from Stellenbosch who donated 2 big bags of nearly new perfect 0-3 months baby clothes (Exactly what we continuously need!)
Ilhaam van Heerden at Woolworths Head Office who gave us 4 bags of chino fabric
Bill Rae who lives in Sea Point who donated 20 of the sweetest little hand knitted baby jerseys & matching booties that his late wife Ann knitted. I hope she can look down and see 20 cozy little babies decked out in her finery!
Ever faithful Suzie from my church who buys us a constant supply of baby products and pads
If I have left anyone out pls forgive me, my trusty admin helper Pippa had her son Thomas last week so is trying to cope with 5 year old Jordy, 15 month old very heavy Emily and 11 day old Thomas.

Thanks to everyone, you guys rock!

Thursday...lumpy throat & prickly eye day

2006-10-06T16:16:00.000+02:00

I do not do the Monday hospital run due to my rather unreliable nanny who doesn't always pitch up to take care of Sofia. So, my day is Thursdays.
When I tell people about the hospital they often say "I could never do it, how do you cope?"

Some days better than others but I have inherited a couple of good points from my mom (along with the unfortunate bandy cowboy legs) which equip me to handle the heartache moments.

She is very calm and strong in a crisis. She is good at saying little, holding tightly and not adding to a stressful situation by her own emotion.
I am not quite there yet but I am learning. When I am with someone who is upset or crying, it is THEIR sadness and I cannot cry with them. I can share in their sadness but not fall apart. Later yes, but not just then. I really think the language difference helps rather than hinders as I have mentioned before. Stops me from trying to fill the gaps with arbitrary unhelpful things I would want to say.

This Thursday was a lumpy throat day for me. I felt tearful and a little sad all day. Didn't cry but had a definite lump in my throat and wanna-cry-eyes. It is a little weird coming home to normality but I do seem to be able to be relatively normal once home. I guess I have desensitized to keep myself functioning.
We are mostly careful about never giving a bag to a mother who doesn't have her baby with her, unless they are expressing milk. Our wonderful Aggie accidentally gave a lady to a woman on her own. When we were out the room when a nurse told us she was a Choices mother. Choices is a crises pregnancy centre helping woman with unplanned pregnancies. Most babies are adopted by European parents and go on to have an awesome life with loving parents.
She was looking through the bag and crying. I felt SO bad for her and I went to sit with her and apologize telling her she was welcome to keep the bag and give the clothes to the nurse to dress her baby daughter in which was in the nursery. She was so heartbroken, 1st instinct is to persuade her to keep the baby but she has no one, an abusive boyfriend and no finances. This little girl is going to amazing loving parents that have been desperately waiting for her arrival. I just told her she is a brave special mother to put her daughter first and that her girly will have a good life. I always take photos of the babies just in case, somehow, they might want it later. I am going to leave it with the hospital or at Choices itself. Will check with them what they suggest as they are very expert in the adoption area. We prayed for her daughter as well who looked peaceful and healthy.

We also had a tiny little boy who was born at home and then taken to Tygerberg Hospital initially and now Hotties Hospital. He is a 25 weeker of 840g but a strong little fellow. It's incredible he survived the birth and journey and I hope to see him next week.

Kangamoms of preemies all in good spirits, stocked up their tea & coffee supply and we left them snacks. Left a twin bag for one mother who has to leave her little babes to go and work all day and then come kanga them at night. The kangacare is so great because not only do babies thrive, but the bond between mom & baby is initiated and strengthened.

The rest of the moms all thrilled to receive their bags. Many boys born again which was the same on Monday when Alice & Helen gave out 19 bags.
Saturday 21st is officially the 1st Saturday run so we are trusting that we are going to have a serious provision week.

Once again I get to thank many kind people who gave goods this week....
Ilse Badenhorst who bought us cup-a-soup for kangamoms, nuk bottles & teats and Dr Whites

Suzie Cunningham who always spoils us and this week bought loads of pads, nappies & soap for mom

G & D Colleen Gast who gives us all her rag mags and bought 4 babygros

"Jones" who sent us a parcel Australia. (How do I get hold of you to thank you?)

Winnie from the Strand who knitted a bunch of things for the preemie babies

Chris Hinrichsen for fetching my fabric from SBH in Epping

Colette's auntie who is donating a microwave

Wanda van der Bijl from little star who donated 4 beautiful quilts and 2 cot bumpers from her range

The kind lady from Totsmart who gave us the baby textured playmate (sorry don't know your name?)

Emma Pardoe & Helen Quinn who give us a stand at Totsmart for free

Mish for taking up the slack and doing all the cards

Nikki Richards who presents me with those bright pink Freedom pads at church (people must think I am one menstrual woman!)

I will do a better "how-to-help AND where-to-send" on next post
One of these fine days I will learn how to update blog myself but in the meantime...thanks lovely Bridgette!

Mel's own babies

2006-10-04T14:51:00.000+02:00

My own "babies"
Although I love all these newborns, my own kids do come first of course. Life is pretty hectic with 3 children.
Daniel is 10, he is a very relaxed boy. Nothing phases him much and he cruises along in life happily while his mother (the long suffering me) runs after him collecting lost shoes, bringing left at home lunch and rushing to help him finish the school project that he had 10 days to do but does at the last minute. He is a lot like his Aunty Tersh and Uncle Paulie were at school. I love him, he is funny and clever and handsome (really, it's not just me who says so) and has an excellent entrepreneurial spirit.
Somehow I always owe HIM money, he buys and sells and wheels and deals. It's the Jewish blood from my grandfather running deep in those veins!
He is a lot of work.
Rebeka age 4, is sensitive, intense, very intelligent. She feels everything a little more....cold, heat, sadness, joy, terror, rejection etc. She is never naughty, she is so well behaved its embarrassing sometimes. My friend Jen calls her a Barney Kid (one of those annoying singing kids on the Barney show)
She is however whingey and whiney. Her sister arrived when Rebeka was 2 and 1 week old. Hard to deal with when you are Rebeka. I tell her all the time she is my favorite although truth be told, I tell the others too! Rebeka really is special, I love you Becks!
She is even more work!
And then my 2 year old Sofia or Fifi as we call her. She is a pleasure, normal naughty irrational 2 year old but has an amazing personality. She is fun and cute and so happy-go-lucky. Sings constantly, hugs, makes friends. She is so delicious I want to inhale her and eat her up and squeeze her till she squeals. She is not quite on the same level as her sister at the same age (yes I know don't compare but hey, I'm a Mom!) and when I ask what colour, she replies.... colour or lellow. (Becks saying every single shade and colour by 2) Sofia is at home with me and comes everywhere I go. She hates staying home being the socialite she is.
She, although just 2, is not actually that much work but hard TO work when she's around.
Running BB keeps me very busy and Sofia already hates the Pooter (computer) and performs when I need to work. This makes me want to swear and be ugly to her. (occasionally I give in to the urge)
Fifi can also not come to the hospital and some days I want to stay longer and Doula but then my nanny, Cynthia phones to say she is crying so I have to come home. When I pack bags they want to "help" and it's so frustrating! I suppose anyone who works from home has the same issues. Except that they make money, but that's another issue all together.....
Anyway, what I saying is that much of my time, money, energy and resources go into BB and sometimes I don't have much left for my own kids. The plus is that they know what I do and if they want to play with something, then I tell them it's for the "poor babies".
They know the world doesn't revolve around them and although I am their mom, I am also other things to other people and they need to stand in line occasionally.
Poor husband Gary stands somewhere way at the back waving trying to get my attention! Love you honey! Blowing you a kiss because too many people in the way for a direct smooch. Mwah xxxxx

Ups & downs at Bosom Buddies

2006-10-02T17:12:00.000+02:00

Have actually been feeling a bit like bouncing bosoms... sometimes up, sometimes down, sometimes perky, often saggy!
Running a NPO is a major learning curve for me, I learn so much about people and myself. The lessons are tough and I am clearly slow in learning some of them as God sees fit to repeat them again and again!
Oh well, character building blah blah hey?
Let me start with the downs and get the moaning out the way.
Disappointment! I am very bad at dealing with disappointment. They say somewhere in Proverbs... hope defers makes the heart sick and its very true. For the past 2 or 3 weeks some people have let me down so badly and just disappeared from the help radar. People get busy, bored, distracted etc and they then don't feel like or are unable to help with BB. Of course BB runs on which means poephead me cannot get bored, distracted, busy ect and land up running on my own. It's not so much the work load (am hard working busy bee) as the loneliness and discouragement that comes from working alone. I care about the people that help me and I don't want to piss anyone off so I carefully ask and pussyfoot and send many, many (unanswered) texts to which people don't reply. So I get hurt and cross and then they get cross if I get cross. Stupid huh? Anyway, bottom line is we are all getting together to discuss who wants to stay on board, areas of responsibility, communication and just a general strat session. Hope I don't cry!
Clothing from Somerset West and the mothers in my area has been slow. I don't understand how people have got so blind to the needs of other new mothers in our community right under our noses. Come on girls, these are our sistas! We share a bond, let's share whatever else we can with these moms. (do have lovely awesome exceptions which will thank in a bit!)
And now for the Babies and Moms
Ah, the reason for all of the above. Precious special delicious people who I love, love. LOVE! Hospital still going well of course. Ashamed to say still haven't started Saturdays but promise, sometime in October, will literally take that leap of faith and JUST DO IT! Lots of baby boys been born lately. Unfortunately many very prem babies but only 1 stillbirth since I last wrote. Once again gave her a beautiful gift pack from Bridgette with a few extras added in. The moms have been well and pretty positive.
On Thursday we had a HIV pos mom who was cup feeding her newborn daughter (drastically reduces chance of babe getting HIV if not breastfed) and she was so positive and strong. When we prayed for her she just broke down and cried and suddenly her brave exterior crumbled. She was beautiful and I am always so proud of these strong African woman. We are a major bunch of wussies compared to them as 3 of the ladies who had delivered that morning were leaving at noon just a few hours later. One lady had a babe dressed in pink from head to toe and it was in fact, her 4th son. She was desperate for a daughter and had believed this little boy to be her girly. At least we could give him a blue outfit although she was clearly disappointed. Hope she gets a bunch of granddaughters one day! A little prem girl from the previous week had died but I wasn't surprised, that poor little scrap of person was the thinnest, smallest saddest individual I have ever seen. I remember praying for her and just not knowing what to say. It sounds harsh that the babies under 28 weeks are not assisted in any way but realistically, the problems that many prem babies have later, compounded with a mother without support or finances is just too tough. Plus any disability in the African culture is often barely tolerated. It's just SO sad.
Anyway, in general things going well and everyone stoked to receive their bags which are looking gorgeous thanks to Jeanine & Rosalie and all other kind sewing ladies.
All my grateful thank yous!
In the week of been on my lonesome ownsome and being all bratty, God comes through like he always does and I get such awesome much needed stuff. When I packed on Wednesday I had 2 vests left and was actually about to buy for the next week. Now my box is full and I cannot even close the "boy" box. Blankets are very low but I am buying fleece today for Gina and Yolandie to sew. Granny Lesley is back from holiday so will also make for us.
Carice & Andre van Selm who gave me a massive box of beautiful clean pressed clothing. (the bigger stuff I pass on to other charities so hope its cool?)
The moms from the Breastfeeding Clinic at Vergelegen Hospital who left me clothes and products. (thanks to Leanna & Erica for collecting)
My gorg & glam always generous friend Colleen Gast who gave me loads of lovely clothes from Dylan.
Illora & Klaus who give me cash from time to time and gave me a bag of lovely baby clothing.
Nikki Richards who always buys us pads.
Ilse Badenhorst who has given lots of things to the moms and who is now giving us a monthly financial contribution.
Pippa & Chris Hechter and Pippa's mom who gave us cash and products. Pippa you know how desperate we are for moola so yay!
Anne Green from my neighborhood who also donated clothes
Adrienne Liebenberg from our church for products and cards
Warren at Dischem once again for 2 big boxes of various goods plus nappies
Emilie & Storm Webster for more nuts and for coming along to the hospital
Elzabeth for 6 knitted teddies
Enid Ryall, Daphne Veer and the other ladies from the old age home in Tokai for the precious knitted little jerseys and booties
Suzie from church who gives quietly and faithfully all the time
Frank Land from the Invisible Card Co for supplying cardboard for the cards
Dezi & Verna, 2 dynamic older ladies from my church for baby clothes and prayer.
Lynn, Millie & Bridgette from USA who gave me masses of beautiful-makes-me-cry baby clothes and goods from the US and UK. I wish you could see what you mean to these mothers and to me. Love you!
Marietta from my church for her gorg clothing she donated. Ek is life vir jou my mooi vriendin!
Chantelle & Nikki, pretty sisters from Somerset West who gave me bigger clothing. I gave to Agape (for disabled kids) in Grabouw
Pat van Zyl, Hannah's granny who knitted me funky hats and booties
Pippa Pringle for loads of beautiful baby clothes from son James
Marvelous Martha, my good friend for the 10 babygros she bought
Jenny & Tim Norris who gave BB a financial contribution
Sister Tertia for collecting baby clothes from Lynn & Millie
Thanks very kind lovely best friend donors, cannot do this without all of you. Because you bless us, you too will be blessed, that's just how life works!

More pictures

2006-09-15T17:01:00.000+02:00

Gorgeous pictures

2006-09-15T16:57:00.000+02:00

In memory of Franchesca...

2006-09-10T19:23:00.000+02:00

I don't want all my posts to be sad (in case no one wants to read!) but I need to tell you all about the little daughter of one on "my" mothers.
On the 31st we went for our Thursday visit and the hospital was fairly quiet for a change. One of the women was in pre labour sitting on the bed with her huge belly. Her eyes were swollen and looked like the saddest person I have ever seen.
When I asked her why she was so sad she said she had lost her daughter 2 days before. I presumed it was her infant daughter born stillborn but then she said it was her 6 year old, Franchesca. They didn't know what happened but she just started bleeding through her nose and ears. Her mother was waiting for her husband so they could go to the police to do the paperwork for the autopsy. She was 1 cm dilated and expecting twins. She was on my mind the entire week but I don’t usually see the same people because they are out so quickly. Another woman had also upset me because she was in pre labour with twins and crying softly from fear. They were trying to stall the labour.
The Monday thereafter was uneventful and then this Thursday I arrived to a hectic baby booming day with all beds full.
Both twin moms had gone home and then returned the day before to birth their babies. Franchesca's mom had a boy and a girl and the other lady boys. I was so glad I could see her again. Bridgette had sent us 5 fluffy bunnies and I had one with me. I gave it to her and sat on the bed holding her just wishing I could have eased her pain a bit. Her twins were so beautiful but they were just not her big girl. Her other little daughter is 4 and very upset and confused by the death of her sister and the absence of her mother to birth the babies. She is getting the little bunny when her mom gets home.
So Bridgette, that seemingly insignificant bunny from half away across the world has found a very important place. I had read that morning that God uses us to touch the people who HE wants to touch that day and it just confirmed it all.
The other mom of twins was very chuffed with her gorgeous sons. All the mothers were opening their bag and dressing the babies in the new outfits. So cute! I had a 16 year old in labour, also terrified but fortunately, her mom was on the way.
We did have 3 new minute preemies whose mothers were sitting waiting to go home. They are still too tiny and fragile to kangacare. No stillbirths since the 17th of August which is awesome. The other visits fairly uneventful. The nurses loo is finished and they are very chuffed so thanks Colette!!
I have a contact for pads and I am getting them at R7 a pkt for 12 pads. We are hoping to get a monthly sponsorship of R1000 per month so I don't have to open the pkt and give them half. 10 people at R100 a shot, shouldn’t be too hard too find?
The box of stuff in the US was unfortunately (or actually fortunately) too large to bring back but they are shipping it back to SA. So whoever sent, we will get and I thank you in advance!!
We have had a good clothing/ product donation time again so thanks to all of you who support us. In particular I want to thank:
My 32wk preg friend Laura who gave me 2 big bags of babygros and vests
Lara from Mish's cell group who went shopping for us and bought clothes and bottles
Suzie who gave us R100 and always buys us pads
Anri from Happy Days preschool who gave me 2 bags of freshly laundered and folded baby clothes and blankets (she is preg with baby # 3 but says has enough for him!)
Shireen from Johnson & Johnson who sent us 2 big boxes of various baby products
Rinda from Helderzicht Pharmacy who collected some feeding bras for us
Marla, Donna, Jeanine & Rosalie for their beautifully sewn bags
Nadine's granny Mrs Boshoff for her precious knitting
Kate & Carina for their monthly financial contributions
My brother Paul who gave us a financial donation
Sonia's moms from Moms & Tots who donated clothing and baby blankets
My cousin Wendy who bought us 5 babygros and a huge pile of baby mags for the moms (congrats on your 4.2 kg big little son Alec born Tues 5th Sep!)
Andre & Carys who gave me a breast pump, babycarrier and toygym (swopped at baby shop for a whole pile of baby clothes)
Gareth Murray from Cartridge Wharehouse who swapped out some cartridges and gave us an extra one
And thanks to all my volunteers who help to ensure we do what we do ……..bless these awesome mothers & their beautiful scrumptious little babies.
I am hoping by the time I do another post I have had the sewing situation sorted and have started Saturdays as well. Have I mentioned the lady I employed did a runner with all my fabric, scissors and cotton and 40 bags?
Anyway, we live and learn. Like you, I am a novice at living. This is my 1st try.
Mel

Another email from Mel

2006-08-27T15:27:00.000+02:00

intend to do a profile on all my volunteers soon with pics and all. On Friday I attended a brunch called "Woman for Change" which was pretty awesome. They gave me an opportunity to talk about Bosom Buddies and a fair amount of woman asked me for my details and seemed keen to get involved. I need to do my thank-you update to all of you who support us, so....
Big smoochy thanks to Bridgette in US for sending us another precious parcel for my babies, (5 cuddly soft blankies, 5 bunny rabbits, candy and bracelets for mom, little bodyvests/onesies for babes and a card for each mom)
Thanks to Pam Roberts and the ladies from Strand Rotary for 800 Huggies newborn nappies
As always thanks to Oumie (Mrs Theres Godfrey) who is my chief knitter and makes 30 beanies a week plus knits a jersey a day. She is 78!!
To Warren & Julie from Dischem in Somerset West, who sent us 5 boxes of odds and ends for BB (and Lee for the intro)
A second thanks to Lynne McKenzie who received 20 balls of wool from a friend and donated to BB
To Gawie, one of my volunteers husbands' who had a birthday and requested things for BB instead of gifts for himself (sure prompted by gorg wife Nadine!!)
To Melissa from Melissa's who sent us some yum snack bars for the mothers. (Oh boy was I tempted but no worry, stayed strong!)
And to all of you who buy us things from time to time. We are blessed by your kindness and can, in turn, bless the moms and babes.
Please don't forget to send us your 2nd hand newborn clothing and if you shop on-line for us....... Freedom Nighttime pads pls!
Pics to follow next week, I promise!
Mel and BB girls xxx

The last 3 visits

2006-08-24T14:59:00.000+02:00

Hi Bridgette

The last 3 visits...
Because we are dealing with babies and maternity, every visit is different. Sometimes I leave on such a high, other days feel hopeless and sad.
Last Thursday was a hard day. It wasn't very busy but we had 2 ladies who were 42 weeks plus and only then being induced (I always worry about the baby!)
1 18 year old girl all alone in prem labour at 7 months. They were trying to stop the labour and it looked as if she could go home.
We had a 16 year old skinny girl who had her son in the bed with her but looked so bewildered and disconnected to her baby.
A lady whose son was stillborn at 38 weeks (thanks Bridgette for sympathy packs for this poor woman) Her and her husband walked down the passage with an empty carrycot/baby carrier.
A woman whose son was 2 minutes old (born while we were there) and so beautiful but then gets popped in an incubator to warm up with a sick baby next to him.
Tiny prems sharing incubators with full term unwell infants.
I just need to jump in quickly and say don't judge the staff, they do the best they can with the little they have. We have been doing up their bathroom which is almost done. Will post before and after pics next week.
And then their was Monday.......... Colette and her girls went and it wasn't very busy but she visited with a mother who was a tik addict. She said it was so upsetting for her because this poor little boy had club feet and lines where his toes should have been. He had a massive head with slitty eyes and no real nose. Just 2 holes apart on his face. The girls mother was with her and had to see the results of her daughters revolting addicition. I feel sorry for all 3 of them. It's easy to hate the young mother but we don't know her circumstances. The baby was going off to Tygerberg where he will hopefully have facial reconstructive surgery.
Fortunately today was such an awesome day with lots of gorgeous babies and moms. We gave out 18 bags. The neonatal ICU was full but not sick full term babies, just lots of tiny babies. One of the twin girls from 2 weeks ago wasn't looking very good. Poor sweet girl. Please God, take care of this little person! I have a new sewing lady called Janine who lives in Stellenbosch. She makes me the most gorgeous bags and if it wasn't for her and Rosaline, we would have no project!

There is more to come. Mel had to tend to her children.

BB update

2006-08-11T13:40:00.000+02:00

Yesterday morning was our hospital visit. The ward was pumping with babies and moms literally overflowing out of beds. The nurses come in and tell the moms they need the beds so they need to get dressed and go wait in the kangaroom for people to come collect them.
The girl who makes our cards, Michelle, had come with on her 1st visit so was rather overwhelmed at the whole experience. I hate it that I have become desensitized to it all but I think its emotional survival mode. I need to be strong and keep a slight distance or will just crack at every visit.
We give out 21 bags, only 7 boys and the remaining girls. Must be the Womans Day celebration in keeping with Wednesday the 9th.
In the kanga room we chat to the mothers of these minute mini people who look like frail birds. I always ask how much they weighed at birth and their current weight now and so many don't know. Weird cos that is such a major in our culture. They also only name their babes much later. One girl looks about 16 years old and her baby daughter in the neonatal ICU weighing 950 grams. The lady next to her has a daughter of just under a kilo. I tell them how strong black woman are and we pray extra hard for these very prem babes. The other preemies are all looking good and firmly attached to milky breasts.
When I restock the tea & coffee I notice the kettle is missing. One of the mothers stole it when she went home. Irritating but will ask at church who can replace for me.
I remind the nurses I haven't forgotten about them and still intend doing up their toilet/restroom. (I really do!!)
Have 1 lady who has just given birth and we get to see her big healthy daughter within minutes. She squints at us in that beautiful calm way that newborns do immediately following birth. Her poor mom tore so was getting stitched and had to be put on a drip due to blood loss. At least she can stay until the following day. (Many leave after 6 hours!)
The remaining woman are all fine and happy to receive their gift. Some very quiet, some weepy and a few friendly. Like always I guess.
No stillbirths today, praise God! I love bringing that bag back home with me. I only had 17 bags with me so had to drive home and fetch another 4. Sofia my 2 year old saw my car pull in so she had to come with, along with Analisa, the 6 year old daughter of my nanny. The 2 of them had to wait on a little bench while I took the remaining bags.
Analisa looks like Grace Jones. Gorgeous big smile, so black she is almost purple and not a word of English. She calls me Mummy, very cute. Sofia is very blonde and fair with a pudgy baby body and speaks in 2 or 3 word sentences, they make a lovely pair and communicate perfectly. LOVE kids.
And so that was a typical Bosom Buddies visit.
Pls remember to keep aside all baby clothes for us. We hope to do an additional day soon which means another 15 bags a week.
Thanks to all of you who support us, you are awesome!
Mel

A few things from Mel

2006-08-09T16:38:00.000+02:00

Hi Vicky & Bridgette
Here is the UK add for anyone in the UK who wants to send babyclothes or wool. (pls put on blog)
My sister-in-law Martina will keep for us and bring back when they come down for the wedding.
Our address is 73 White Lion Street, Angel, London, N1 9PF, UK
Thanks.

Dearest Sharon, Dana, Tracy Rant, Shanna (all US) and Sheridan Powell (Australia)
To the kind ladies at The Boland Ladies Network
We have finally sorted out the bulging suitcase Gary brought back from the States. He had to unpack all parcels to fit everything in so I am not exactly sure what is from whom (Except gorg blankies made by Shanna, clothes and cool mom stuff)
Sheridan from Aus send us baby blankets and toys and lovely smelley soaps.
Tracey, Dana & Sharon beautiful baby clothes and some baby products.
It is literally a Godsend as while I was away, the clothes dwindled to nothing and Claire & Colette, my fellow South Africans, were not even able to pack bags for the Monday like we usually do. They had to scrounge around and send emergency mail out to our church asking people to pls buy. Then I was back with the goods and I packed for Monday on Sunday evening as well as for the following Thursday and the next Monday.
Of course this is also largely due to the wonderful ladies at The Boland Ladies Network who gave us 23 packed bags, a promise of R1000 by end of Sep and a few loose products for the bags.
2nd hand baby clothes is the biggest need at the moment so pls send us whatever you can from friends and fam.
Vicky from the UK has promised us wool which she'll send to my brothers address in the UK. Things are happening!!
The girls had amazing visits at the hospital while I was away. One of the mothers was very hostile and wanted nothing to do with her baby, no holding or no feeding. Didn't want to know. The nurses had tried everything and then super Aggie arrives and starts gently speaking & praying in Xhosa with her for ages. Something clicks and she asks for her babe and pops it on the breast, milk and maternal love slowely starting to trickle out. The nurses were amazed and they were both discharged the next day.
Have another real Lordy healing story but will wait for Nadine (one of volunteers) to mail me.
Thanks again special kind girls,
Mel

Sad and happy news from Mel

2006-07-20T15:12:00.000+02:00

Most of these posts are from Mel, but posted by me, Bridgette:

Had great visit this morning but unfortunately had to give out one of your stillborn packs. Fortunately we had Aggie who is a black SA lady that speaks Xhosa and could really hug and hold this woman. Its awesome to have her with us on our team. We gave out 16 bags plus the sympathy bag so right now 5 little African babies are wearing the clothes you lovingly selected and sent to us. How sweet is that!!
We also got to see a baby from last week who has improved so dramatically its a miricle. The previous week I was so worried he would die he looked so ill. He wasn't a prem and I don't know whats wrong with him. Overall a great visit. I am away on vacation for 2 weeks so chat when I'm back.
Take care,
Mel

A few things from Mel

2006-07-16T04:42:00.000+02:00

Had such a cool hospital visit on Thursday. Had a young girl from out of town who was bleeding at 32 weeks and far from home so literally had nothing with her. We could reassure her and make sure she had things for herself like toothpaste & brush, soap etc. Took your bag of Tootsieroll candy out of the sympathy bag and gave to her as well. I do not know if her babe was born or if they could stal the labour. Lots of kanga moms with tiny little babes all snug between their mama's boobs.

BB has had a good week in terms of donations. VERY grateful to all.
400 cloth/towelling nappies donated from Colibri.
11 little cardigans bought by my sister Nina.
16 babygrows bought with money from a company called Pivot & Squaremetre
6 packs of pads and lots of instant soup from one of Tertia's SA readers called Ilse B
Bought 10 little jerseys from money my mom gave me (was supposed to be for wool but bought at a second hand shop)
Bag used clothing plus a pack pads from Sarah, mom to Hannah & Alexander
And of course, the awesome package from Henriette in California!
Yahoooooooooo!

Thank you Henriette

2006-07-12T15:08:00.000+02:00

Honey-Pie Henriette
Its here at last, your gorgeous parcel. We are so low on clothing and pads so has come at the perfect time. I LOVE the little outfits you selected and the blankies to match. The lipstick is such a sweet touch as I think any woman feels less than her best after giving birth, leaky boobs and raging hormones. Also draws attention away from dark rings under sleepless eyes!
Well done on leaving the tags on, you are right about the mom's delight in recieving new clothes. When our stocks are low I also have to buy and we always remove prices but leave tags.
Please don't apologize about storebought blankets, we can't all be crafty Betty Crockers like your fellow sweet knitting and crocheting Americans. (Please don't stop dear Betty's)
Your pretty little clothes from your daughter will be kept until summer time.
The sympathy packs are also very thoughtful. I was telling Tertia we haven't had to give a sympathy bag for about 6 weeks now. Awesome hey! Obviously I believe its the prayer as the prem numbers also seem to be dropping. Whatever it is, its such a relief when we don't have the daily stillbirths. Comforting someone is already near impossible, comforting someone of another language and culture is should be harder but actually isn't. I think its because a hug and touch and just saying nothing works better than awkward empty words.
I don't want you to spend too much money on postage so send to the US address if you want. We should have people going over every 3 months or so.
Thanks again for the precious parcel you sent BB.
Lotsalove, Lotsagratitude,
Mel
xxx

And this too (Bridgette here again)

I received such a gorgeous parcel from Henriette Kuehne in California this morning.
Gary has recieved 9 parcels at the US office and has just bought a new huge suitcase to put them in.
Exciting hey!
LOVE all you awesome American ladies!
Mel

A story from Melanie

2006-07-11T21:04:00.000+02:00

I do have an awesome story from yesterday.

We have a very cool American lady in our church who has 6 kids. She employs a wonderful Christian lady called Thembisa who helps out in her house.
Helen and Thembisa are part of our Monday team who visit the hospital. Its so cool to have her because the language barrier no longer exists for our team. Thembisa goes to a local township church and they have to visit people in their community as part of their outreach so she goes to visit some of the new moms.
Anyway, I have another friend from my church called Pippa who has been dying to go see what we do. On Monday I told her I would take care of 11 month old Emily and 5 year old Jordy while she went. Her and Alice landed up leaving a bag for a mother in labour but this poor woman was in transition and freaking out from pain so clutched onto their hands begging them not to leave her. In her brief 40 second gap between contractions she explains she is Thembisa who has been faithfully visiting every Monday. They got to doula for her and encourage, pray and support until her little daughter was born weighing 3,8kg. They had both had caesars so it was the MOST amazing experience for all 3 of them. Pippa holding one leg, Alice the other, both shouting PUSHHHHHHHHHHH! Thembisa has called her daughter Bethanie which is the name of Helen's oldest daughter. We got to phone Helen immediately who was in Plett to tell her the amazing news.
Everyone was on such a high and I was so stoked that this kind caring lady could have been at the recieving end for a change. Call it fate, call it chance, as a happy clapper, I call it God!!
Hallelujaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. xxxx

More pictures

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All these wonderful things are courtesy of Shanna, her Mom, and I believe her Grandma as well. I am blown away by this.

Amazing.

Pictures

2006-07-11T04:52:00.000+02:00

Bridgette here. Tertia asked me to help Mel out with this blog, and since I adore them both, I was happy to help. Here is a picture that was sent to Mel. I'm still getting the details surrounding this picture, and I will post as soon as all the info is given to me. I know there are more pics coming as well.

Here are a few more pics Mel sent to me:

Some stuff I found about the hospital

2006-06-26T21:46:00.000+02:00

(Tertia here)

I found this blog that I think could have been written by an intern working at the hospital where my sister does her thing. Just another perspective.

About Bosom Buddies in South Africa

2006-06-13T08:33:00.000+02:00

At present I am providing 30 gorgeous diaper bags per week which we sew. I am employing an awesome South African woman who I pay 1 day a week to sew and she works the other day for nothing. (she lives in the township so this is major!) She gets “the vision!!!!!!”

In each bag we put a blanket which we also sew, a vest (think u guys call it a T-shirt?), babygro, little cardigan, woolly hat, socks, a baby product, sanitary pads for mom and a packet of home baked cookies like crunchies or shortbread. We attach a card to the bag and twice a week we go down to my local state hospital and spend time with each mom praying for her and her baby and just creating some excitement when we gift them the gift.

Unfortunately every time I go we have a stillborn baby or a woman in labor with a stillborn. Can you imagine?! We now make sure we have a bag for her with nothing baby on it. We pack it with pads, shampoo, toothbrush and paste, soap & facecloth and cookies for the mom with a sympathy card. She shares a ward with the mothers with their newborns and my heart breaks for her. I can only hold her a while and pray for her. It’s hard.

The hospital is high risk so we have plenty multiples and tiny little preemies. The preemie moms live in a tiny room and kanga care their babes until they are big enough to go home. They sleep on sleeper couches at night. Because they are not patients, they only get 1 meal a day. I have now provided a kettle & cups and keep a constant supply of tea and coffee, instant soup and bread. I have also organized them washing powder and a bucket to wash their clothing. I am trying to get them a microwave sponsored as well as a radio/CD player. There is so much I would like to still do for them as well as for the nurses but I am on my way.

The nurses don’t have a tearoom so they go sit in the loo when they need to cry and stamp their feet and just take time out. It’s big enough to put a chair and table in so that’s the next step along with painting it out and curtains.

Bosom Buddies has only been going since Feb so we have made great progress already! By next year I am hoping to do every mom which is about 220 a month. Sourcing the clothing is major and the mothers in my area have been rather disappointing. I thought I would get tons of second hand clothing but so far it’s been slow.

BUT……….. I am trusting God for provision as he has been so faithful so far!! Once I have everything down pat I intend to go to other areas to “sell” the idea so woman in those communities can take care of their own state hospital.

Anyway, a little about me……..

35 years old

Married to Gary

Mom of Daniel who turns 10 in July, Rebeka who turns 4 next month, and Sofia who turns 2 next month

Doula by profession but never done a paid birth

Running Bosom Buddies Charity

Love the beach, my family, babies and mothers

Have always had a heart for African woman

Have 2 bunnies and 2 rats

Have NO dogs………they poo on my grass, sniff my groin, chew the toys, eat my kid’s food and lick their faces with their gross saliva. (have just looked after dogs for 2 months!)

If you have friends who have unwanted decent newborn or 1^st size baby clothes and want to bless us, please ask them to keep aside for us, and send to:

Melanie Novitzkas
PO Box
2748
Somerset West
7129
Cape Province
SOUTH AFRICA

If you would like to send items locally in the United States, we can make arrangements. Please send me an email, and we will send you a US address.

Thank you,

Melanie

Thank you.

2006-06-12T21:00:00.000+02:00

Thank you for your donation.

Melanie Novitzkas
Cape Provence, South Africa

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